Wednesday, December 8, 2010

rejection therapy day 10 -december 8th

No rejection today, but I feel the best since I have started the therapy. Allow me to rant…

I wanted to make up for yesterdays chickening out of yesterday’s street photography and not taking some street portraits, I thought I would try again today. Once again, I froze. I kept seeing people and thinking “they would be perfect” and then do nothing as they past. I walked up and down the main streets of Birmingham simply letting people pass and letting my hesitation get the better of me, but I ran into a friend that changed things.

A guy who I used to go to school with and saw sparingly around some of the areas I do freelance work spotted me and we chatted. He was curious as to what I was doing, at which point I informed him. This simple act of telling him gave me the incentive to push forward, as someone else knew and may ask in future meetings about how my street portraits were doing. At this point a switch flicked in my head, I asked to take his portrait, which he allowed Failed Rejection After which I asked what he gets up to these days and told me he was going to a gig on Friday, I asked if I could tag along, again he said yes! Yet Another Failed Rejection

After my friend left I felt the need to go up to someone and finally take that photo. I found a victim, an unsuspecting girl smoking a cigarette and most likely waiting for a friend. I walked up to her, she stared blankly at me and I realised I had to talk very quickly.

            “Can I take your portrait?”

            “Errr….yeah, ok”

            “I am photographing a few people around”

            “Right, let me hide my cigarette”

She palmed the smoking ciggerette and smiled. I took a few shots and, not wanting to make the awkward moment last any longer, gave a quick goodbye and quick stepped off. It was Failed Rejection but I got my photo and I knew tomorrow I had to go back for more.

One again I went to the cafe, sat in the same spot with my latte in front of me, but today I felt good. Minor as that achievement was, I was proud that I had pushed myself out of my comfort zone. I am not back to where I used to be in terms of confidence, but this has certainly helped me on my way.

I sat on the bus with a smile on my face and as I got out at my stop I passed a Starbucks that was locking up. I caught eye contact with the girl who was bolting up the glass door from the inside. I still had my big smile slapped across my face, so looking at her like an idiot, I added slight a wave in the mix. She seemed to chuckle slightly and give a light wave back, although her smile was clearly as much out of confusion than genuine happiness; but she smiled and that may have given her a nice end to a working day. After I waved I carried on and didn’t look back. I’ll let that moment stay there Failed Rejection

I didn’t get my rejection, but I pushed myself out of my comfort zone and felt a lot better than I have in a long time. So I had fun just playing the game which I think is more important than scoring points. Today is the first time I truly felt I was playing purely for fun.

…although I will admit I did want to score that goal and get the rejection; so my aim tomorrow is TWO REJECTIONS. Time to set targets and have some fun.

Below is the street portrait I took of the aforementioned young lady. The photo came out terribly I know, but I wanted to post it here as an incentive to myself to document these things. Reject on.

For an explanation of Rejection Therapy see this post

For an explanation for Street Portrait Project see this post