Thoughts from a Sneaky Little Fox

rejection therapy day 13 -december 11th

Went to get my hair cut today as it really was getting too long and I was getting tired of being mistaken for some kind of hermit. I have never been that bothered about my hair, usually just getting it shaved off or leaving it till it grows way too long and starts to cause problems with my vision. So when the hairdresser asked the expected question “What do you want done?”  the smile on his face was quickly replaced by fear as I replied “I don’t know, do whatever you think would look good.”

It seemed the idea of just doing anything and cutting off so much hair was too much pressure for him and he refused. I told him that I have never really given much consideration to my hair, so I don’t really know what ‘style’ would look good, so just go for it. Again he refused and was too frightened that he would upset me, possibly thinking that a hair barbarian like myself would develop stomach ulcers with a sharply cropped barnet on my head. So I relented and just told him to cut it shorter and neat. Rejected

Street Portrait Project #4

I got portraits of two people today, Nick and Katja who were walking round Solihull. Below is Nick who at first refused to smile, but when I asked why he wouldn’t give a smirk for the camera he replied “I never smile”, which straight away resulted in Katja laughing and him smiling in return; resulting in this photo.

It was late in the day and cloudy so the light isn’t great, but still thanks to Nick and Katja for giving up their time.

For an explanation of Rejection Therapy see this post

For an explanation of Street Portrait Project see this post

My Flickr

rejection therapy day 11 -december 9th

“You’re going to go out and start a fight with a total stranger…You’re gonna start a fight…and you’re gonna lose.” 

Tyler Durden, Fight Club 

I may not have been looking for a fight today, but the sentiment was the same. I was looking to lose. I thought my Street Portrait Project was a way of getting instant rejections, but unfortunately for me it seems people are just too damn friendly. I worked up the courage and once I got my first portrait from my first rejection attempt I was on a roll. I had taken about half a dozen portraits before I realised no one had rejected me. I am thankful that I have a backlog of good portraits, but a little annoyed that no one had told me to sod off. Failed Rejection

I wanted, as we all do sometimes, some fudge. Luckily at the Christmas Market there was a stand selling just that confectionary in a pick’n’mix style, so I had a gander of what fudges were on offer. I was tempted by a type of ‘champagne’ fudge, but didn’t want to invest without knowing if it was any good. I saw a moment for rejection.

                “Can I try some of this fudge?”

                “We’ve run out of taster samples”

                “Can I pick some out and try it?”

                “No.”

                “How about that little bit?”

                “…No.”

Rejected

Yesterday I stated that I wanted two rejections, knowing that I would feel a bit sad face if I did not reach my target, I went on the hunt. I realised that I never just say hello to people on the street, as I like so many others had always been a bit suspect of people who did such things. Well today I was one of those people. I saw a lady walking towards and she made eye contact. I locked on and had her caught in my tractor beam. She carried on walking towards me and just as she was in vocal range I let out a “Hello”…too which she quickly looked away and shuffled off pretty sharpish. Huzzah. Rejected

An interesting added note to my Street Portrait saga this morning. I took photos of a couple, Jon and Abi, who I spotted walking along outside the library. Although hesitant of the strange hairy man, they were polite enough and let me take their photos. Fast forward several hours into the evening and I am at a gig at a pub in town, invited by a friend who works in an art gallery. This gig was to raise funds for a degree art show for City of Birmingham Fine Art students and as I look round the crowd I spot Abi and Jon. Just before I have to catch my late bus home, I saunter over to the two and in turn point at them while saying “Jon and Abi”. It takes a few seconds and then the penny drops, which in turn leads to smiles growing across their faces and quickly turns into laughing (and a little bit of screaming by Abi).

It turns out Abi was one of the degree students and in the brief chat they invited me to their final art show and introduced me to some of their friends. Ruddy nice fellows.

So below is Abi, #2 in the Street Portraits Project. Proof that it is pretty amazing what can happen when you put yourself out there.

For an explanation of Rejection Therapy see this post

For an explanation of Street Portrait Project see this post

Rejection therapy Day 4 - December 2nd

Pretty disappointing day in rejection therapy terms, but that is due to some unforeseen problems.

The one thing I did manage to do is ask an editor who I used to write for, but had not spoken to in a while, if he wanted me to write for the magazine again…considering last time we spoke wasn’t on the greatest of terms. He said he would think about it. Partial Rejection

…then I asked if he wanted me to cover an event this weekend (pay for me to go and the like). He said no. Awesome! Rejected

Rejection therapy - an introduction

I have decided to become a reject. I want to be rejected. This questionable shift in my sanity is thanks to Jason Cowlely and his Rejection Therapy.  The idea is that, for 30 days, you look for a away to get rejected each day.  Rejection equals success.

The idea, as explained by former Rejection Therapy practitioner Jason Shen is to “ reduce the fear and pain felt around rejection, encourage more open and “risky” social interactions and reap the many rewards that this comes with.”

For some time now I have been working on a pretty much purely experience basis. While this was the plan for a few months, it has got to the point where I have had few paid jobs in the past year. In sending out more CVs and application forms than I could possibly remember, I have in turn received a lot of rejection. This has been disheartening to say the least, especially with dwindling funds meaning I can take less opportunities for fun and also leading to the desperation for a job. In the past year there has also been personal matters which have defeated me and I experienced a rejection to something that I was prepared to dedicate my life towards.

So I have decided to change my perspective on rejection, seeing it as the opposite of regret and just getting out into the world. I have sat at my computer for far too long and if I want to find ways of being rejected then I better get out there and get in the mix.

I will also being hopefully using this as a way for inspiration for my writing, photography and illustration.

For 30 days (starting November 29) I will try to find a way of being rejected every day and endeavour to blog them here.

I will also outline the attempts I made to get rejected and got accepted or some other outcome, as I believe these are just as important.

Some days I will be too busy or away from a computer and need to catch up, but I will make sure every day is accounted for.

Happy rejecting